What's in a name?

A few days ago, I was at a kennel set up by a friend. The gent, is a most interesting person. Fighter pilot, commercial airlines pilot and now security dog trainer.He remids me of Capt. Haddock from the Tintin comics. Gruff and irratable, but a wonderful guy. Well, at the kennel, I bumped into different breeds of dogs, and with my limited knowledge about them could make out an Alsatian. My friend kept calling it a 'German Shepperd'. Apparently the said dog is a wonderful security dog & was put to good use in the German army and police during WW2. The British, understanding the efficacy of the dog, adopted it, but anything German, was anathema, in Britain, at that point of time so they simply changed the name and called the dog- Alsatian!

Many years ago, at Mumbai airport, while checking in, I was hailed from another 'Q'. There was this chap, in Bermudas, flowery shirt & cotton floppy hat, with sneakers. He introduced himself as Ram and from my school. I'm particularly bad with names and could not place the bloke. To cut to the chase, Ram had an enormous amount of luggage and was asking if I could check some in under my name to avoid excess baggage for him.He would have to fork out a good deal of cash, for the over the limit luggage. Back in the 1980's we were more innocent and I agreed, but I still could not place the guy, American accent and all...............As we spoke, he said he had just returned from the 'States' and was going home to Vizag, the American twang being unmistakable.

With sudden insight, I remembered his name and asked him if he was called 'Shantaram' back then? His smile was a bit sheepish as he said yes, but he had dropped the 'Shanta' part. Too old fashioned, you see. Going forward, I asked him, what he was doing in the US of A? He said, no, " I'm just returning from a two week holiday!. I live in Vizag." I had great difficulty in keeping a straight face. After we landed, and he got his luggage,Ram said, he would have invited me home, but would be busy travelling on business and hoped that I would not mind............!

So, what's in a name?

Happy New Year!

On Edge!

A sobriquet long lost is that of Bengaluru being a 'Pensioner's Paradise'. What it has gained in glitz, glamour & energy has been at the cost of a laid back lifestyle and a gentle civility.While the rapid and many say rabid commercialisation of this town has troubled many, the recent spate of high profile murders has really thrown the spanner in the works.

An IT staffer slitting the throat of his wife. A BPO employee being brought down in her prime. What next? Invariably the finger is pointed to a helpless police.However a closer look at what caused the killings would indicate a breakdown in moral values rather than that of law and order.

A fairly senior policeman told me " What can the police do if a husband wants to murder his wife?" I guess that is a question that, society will have to answer. A while ago, I had said that Bengaluru will be the next hub for innovation, simply because it offers the immigrant a cloak against failure and so allows greater risk. Unfortunately it is this cloak that allows many to cross the line in crime as well.

There are no easy solutions. Lifestyles that are driven by material needs are the order of the day and I do not see that changing in the near future. A society driven by aspiration is good as long as it is ready to wait for its just reward. The issue is when we attempt to take shortcuts, driven by peer pressure, to find solutions.Could the IT staffer have divorced his wife rather than killing her? Was the process too long & torturous? Instant gratification can dish out immediate penalties, like the gent is finding out in jail awaiting his sentence.But then who can wait?

A friend, while gently stroking his petunia's, peered at the humongous traffic on the adjacent road and sighed.The sigh, told the story of a city lost, to a generation.....................!A city on edge, to another.

Foot in the mouth!

Mired in the 2G scam, rising prices of onions and a moribund lower house of parliament, Congress points man Digvijay Singh, emerged the other day with all guns blazing.He brazenly labelled the Hindutva parties as 'Nazis'.

Not surprisingly the saffron brigade was up in arms and responded with all sorts of counter allegations. If Singh was attempting to divert attention from the various scams' that his party finds itself in, I doubt if he has succeeded.

The interesting point in this whole shindig is why did Singh, compare the Hindutva brigade to the Nazis? The Nazis were socialists, which the Hindutva parties, do not claim to be. The Nazis decimated six million Jews, who were rounded up like cattle, from all over Europe and then either worked to death or gassed in various prison camps ( concentration camps ), not before hideous experiments were carried out on them, in the name of humanity and science. I highlighted 'Concentration Camps', because this was the handiwork of the white apartheid Government of South Africa, before the Nazis came about.The Hindutva brigade in India just do not have the capacity to run such a pogrom, not that they have shown an interest. Also, the point remains, as to who are they going to target in India? Is Singh referring to the well documented religious support that Hitler received in Germany, in decimating Jews?

In the midst of the circus, the Government of Israel, issued a terse one liner....asking ignorant politicians to understand the full purport of the Holocaust and not use the tragic deaths of millions of Jews to settle political scores.

Maybe Singh could take a conducted tour of standing concentration camps in Poland & the erstwhile Soviet Union, with a stop over at Nuremberg, to get a better understanding of what Nazi Germany did.

The trip, during summer in Europe at tax payers expense of course!

The CEO game...............

One of the most evolved sports is golf. Golf has attained, somewhat of an elite status, simply because the players are nattily dressed and seem to have overflowing bank balances. Every top CEO seems to want to head to the golf course, to strut the green and exchange yarns over a pitcher of beer. Golf is a kind of exclusive club where the bourgeois don't venture.Apparently it is a setting for networking and building relationships.

I'm not a great fan of golf, the reason being that, I feel its a game for the geriatric, who had more time than skill on their hands. However what I admire is its inclusiveness. The worse you play, the bigger is the handicap that you receive, to get you up to to speed with the rest. This means two things:

#1. You can swing a club, with Tiger Woods and not feel ashamed. ( Assuming that is, he shares an interest in you )
#2. If you lose, you can blame the handicap.

The handicap, is a wonderful tool and many of us adopt it to live life easier. Social handicapping is a wonderful stress buster when used selectively, however it can turn into a major problem if it turns into a habit.

Social handicapping works like this. Just before an examination or major event one falls sick or ill. The rationale is that even if failure occurs it can be blamed on the illness and one need not be accountable.Many folk, down a couple of stiff drinks, of alcohol,before heading out to an important event. They claim it makes them more brave, but in reality they are priming themselves for failure.

There are many many variations of social handicapping and it is a disease. Unfortunately like many malices, many do not even realize that they are a victim till they are fully sucked in.

At the individual level, social handicapping, is a danger, at the Corporate level it is catastrophic. Many organization cultures look elsewhere for their failures rather than within and destroy themselves.

The next time you want to provide yourself a handicap, remember that you are setting yourself up for failure and it is only a temporary prop!Its like buying a lifebuoy before you learn to swim.

As for golf, I wonder if it is a physical sport or a set for a picnic...........

A pat too far!

The last time there was this much talk about a 'pat' was when KPS Gill,the policeman now turned hockey Guru, is said to have patted the rather ample posterior of a lady IAS officer, over cocktails, many years ago. The Sardar, apparently tendered an apology, to the justifiably indignant lady and went on his way.

Last week, yet another lady was in the news. The Indian ambassador to the US, was patted down, by a female security officer, at an airport in the United States, much to the annoyance of the babus in the Ministry of External Affairs. After all a diplomat, is not an ordinary person and how could the Americans do this to us. As Mr. S.M. Krishna, is want to say, 'This is not done'.

Post the event the Indian media, went to town, over the episode.The lady diplomat was targeted, because she wore a 'Saree' and by default the act was racist and in poor taste. My point of view is that, some dumb security staff, just decided to stick by the rule book and did their job thoroughly. It is a fact that the Americans are paranoid about terror attacks and the paranoia shows in their dealing with security, which can be pretty dumb.Attributing racial overtones, is overreacting and foolish.

But then I would rather be dumb than dead. The Americans have not had a terror attack on their soil post 9/11.What about us in India? When last heard, the Indians have protested, the Americans have expressed regret and agreed to 'look into' the fracas and all is quiet on the western front!

Games- On & Off the field!

Mind games are intriguing and extremely effective. In sport, the Brits were past masters and effectively passed on the baton to their cousins the Australians.

It would go like this:

Prior to a cricketing tour to India, the British press, would start talking about, the poor hygiene in India, the lack of cricketing infrastructure, the poverty and so on. This would be followed by, comments that Indians could not play fast bowling and so on. The effect of this would be that the Indian cricketers, uncoached in this area would be on the defensive, even before the first ball was bowled.The battle was lost before it began! An old colonial stunt................

Dale Steyn, the South African quick, was at it the other day, just before, the Indians start their tour of SA. He said the Indians would have a problem, scoring against the South African fast bowlers. I was not surprised.

What surprised me was the Indian response...............because generally we absorb this nonsense. This time, the riposte came from 'The Wall', Rahul Dravid. He said, that the Indians had the necessary fire power, to return the complements and the Africans had better watch out.

Now it is intriguing that this response came from Dravid, because he is the quiet types. The silent types.He is also know the world over, as the 'thinker' and the strategist of the Indian team.When he speaks the opposition listens.In Dravid speaking, a few things have been communicated very clearly:

1. Stop the BS and walk your talk on the field.
2. Dale Steyn & Dravid are team mates for RCB in the IPL, even so............its war now.

Mind games while undesirable are part of the game and I'm glad we have learnt to play them, with finesse!

Nautanki!

Everyday, through work days, I pass over the NICE Road, a tolled road, built brilliantly. At the start of the road, I buy a ticket ( 4 minutes) , at the end, I stop to show a bloke, the ticket, to prove that I've bought a ticket ( 4 minutes ). The trip across, the 9 Km is made in an amazing 4 minutes...............
Phew, now that the math is over, lets get on with my spiel...........The actual productive activity, took just about 30 % of the time, while the rest was unproductive. This morning being, not at my best, I gave the bloke at the checking end an old dated ticket. He, glanced at it, smiled toothily, raised the gate and waved me on. All in 4 minutes. The grin vanished, when I told him that the ticket was a week old. His supervisor, joined the fray and was offended, when I asked him if his lieutenant could read at all and why he was there if he was not doing his job, this amidst furious honking from the rear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The point is why do we go through the motions ? Why do we subject ourselves to the 'nautanki'? Many organizations, go through the motions, without accepting the fact that they are doing so, till a critical mass builds and the organization tips over the point of no returns. Most disasters can be traced back to people and processes that were part of a 'nautanki' or drama rather than practise lean and efficient processes.
Efficient organizations audit their processes and people at regular intervals to identify waste and ruthlessly root it out.........................the direct cost of the 'nautanki' to me? A day of my life in a year!!!!!!!
Returning to the road...................the physical infrastructure is brilliant, the human resources, pathetic. The 'nautanki' goes on.The story of many an organization! Hype & super hype!