Limelight!

A couple of days ago a young man at ABS said that he did not want to choose Human Resources Management as a career because HR's according to his point of view were generally not in the 'limelight'.
Now I do not want to debate the accuracy of this opinion, but rather the idea of being in the limelight...........Is it very important to be the prima donna of a scene or always have the slice of the action? Can we derive satisfaction from the mundane?
In this context I remember a rather interesting story of a lady who worked in a Warsaw ghetto, during the run up to World War 2. The lady knowing the fate of the Jews, went about smuggling Jew babies out of the Ghetto at great personal risk. She spirited 250 infants out......
A couple of years ago she was nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize.............but guess who won, Al Gore, the former American VP, for presenting a 'wonderful piece' on global warming. The lady has since passed on, to hopefully a better world, a fairer world, where being in the limelight is not the sole criterion for living a decent life.
It is this constant requirement to be in the limelight that gets us to miss many of the smaller pleasures of life, after all being in the limelight can be blinding.
Are HR's not in the limelight? The question ruffled a few feathers, in the gathering.
On my way back home, instead os zipping at my 150 KMPH on the NICE road, I made a more sedate 80...............and caught the most amazing sunset, as the setting suns rays bounced off freshly quarried rock. Something I had missed over seven months.

As Audrey Hepburn said..............

There are certain shades of limelight that can wreck a girl's complexion!

Buttermilk Man!

These days lunch and dinner are a bit excruciating.South Indians are fond of ending their meal with curd ( cultured yogurt ) and I'm no exception. I love the stuff, but can only watch as my son laps it up with gusto( cream and all ), while I do with buttermilk or majige ( Kannada ). This due to my wife's latest health diktat.

This is not a health spiel, so don't run away. This is not so much about Karnataka's Upa Lokayukta, Justice Majjige, who understandably on cloud nine, after having taken up the onerous post, a day ago.The poor man, unfortunately suffered a massive cardiac arrest & is now being treated, in of Bengaluru's many hospitals.
The point I'm trying to make, is about a full career. A career where your health does not give way, midway, leaving you gasping for breath and broken before you get to the finish line and breast the proverbial tape.These days people work their careers as if there is no tomorrow, frenetic and in the fast lane. The buzz word- work hard, party harder. I wish all of us were James Bond. Away from reel life, realities are different. The Human body & mind need the time and space to recover, and needs to be pampered, not inundated with stress, smoke and spirits.
A career is a marathon. A race that needs to be spaced out. You cannot do the thing in ten seconds. That's for the glorious few who run the 100 meters. That's for the shooting stars.

You need to be a career athlete, not a flash in the pan!
As for the Upa Lokayukta, I guess the post is up for grabs!As for majige, I'm getting to like the damn stuff........It's cheaper you see and that helps in these days of rising inflation!

Light & Dark!

I read a rather interesting article a few days ago, which spoke about, the effect of dim lighting on a persons levels of honesty & guess what, research has shown, that dim lighting does cause a person to dip to lower levels of honesty and ethical values. Apparently people tend to lie a great deal more as well, when the lighting is subdued.

These findings send some rather salient signals to us:

# 1. Exams are to be held in brightly lit rooms.This would probably induce students to cheat less.

# 2. Do not negotiate with persons wearing dark glasses and wear dark glasses while you negotiate.

# 3. When out on a date, select the darkest corners, if you want to lie to your bf or gf, otherwise go for the bright spots.....

The reason, dim lights make us believe we're less visible and give the feeling that no one is watching us, triggering more moral violations.Thief's often wear masks, hoods, and disguises, which make them feel concealed from view, and people who believe they are hidden really are more likely to commit criminal acts.

Studies have found that people who wore sunglasses felt greater anonymity and so were inclined to play footsie with the truth.The most important point is that, lighting does effect our mood & behavior, so beware!

Also, it's the reason why, I have the lights at their brightest, in my class room, while I teach........................it gets my spiel to be nothing but the unvarnished truth!

In the whirligig of life!

The last year and a half in academia has been a whirligig of excitement, achievement and pure adrenalin for me. While I'm able to discuss, far flung subjects like the fate of the blue whale in the Bearing straits to fog created by forest fires off Singapore and various other HR & OB theories,with equal ease and finesse,I've also noticed that my midriff has been expanding, not alarmingly, but its happening. The increase is incremental like a quality auditor would tell you.

To tackle this middle age malice, I've begun to make a few half hearted attempts at jogging to get the heart pumping at increased levels & fat burnt.Well, on one such sprint this morning, lost in thought, I was rudely shaken out my reverie by a body blow, which sent me sprawling. I was really cold, my feet were slipping around and my hands were rebelling against me. The initial shock gave way to anger & I rose with death in my heart..............& much to my surprise there was this young twenty something kid,mop of black curly hair, with a sheepish look on his face, trying to make apologetic noises. After making rude references to his eyesight, upbringing & so on, to which the guy refrained from responding, we were on our way. However it puzzled me as to how, he could miss a bulk like mine? The question answered itself, when I spotted a group of girls taking a morning jog a short distance away.

After using the general countryside as a public urinal & spittoon, the next best past time for Indians is ogling. We are absolute masters! Nowhere else in the world, do folk ogle as much as we do ( Indians).While the human female, is the most sought after target, we can satisfy ourselves by ogling at other forms as well! A recent study stated that on an average a male spends about one year of his life in ogling ( 365 days )and as for females, about half that ( 180 days ).
Mind boggling! I'm sure an Indian average would be higher.............I can vouch for the males, my lady friends will have to tell me if this is true?

My young friend who knocked me over, was obviously ogling at the females jogging & managed to miss my mass. Mystery solved.I've also been told, that ogling, at the right target can raise your heart rate by 20- 30 % and cut the risk of heart attacks by half!

I'm seriously debating whether it would be more fun to to ogle than jog.........and next time you want to brush the practice away as a waste of time, think again, it might save you that heart attack!

Why do you go to work?

A friend sent this piece to me a short while ago..............I thought it must be shared........
Ready for the root cause of most of your work issues? Here it is:

You (or the people you work with) forget why you go to work.
This may sound overly simplistic but let me share a story that will illustrate how powerful this really can be.
Tim, an old friend of mine has a long history of short stints at work. That frustrates me. He is a super-qualified, high-profile media guy. He’s personable, intelligent and……can’t keep a job.
He’s been married for 2 years. His wife Patti is working her tail off trying to keep them afloat and she’s just about had enough. She sees how qualified Tim is but thinks he gets himself fired (on purpose or subconsciously) because he’s lazy. She doesn’t want another 40 years of this kind of life. She’s threatened to leave if Tim doesn’t get it together. If that wasn’t enough pressure, the couple is just about to lose their home to foreclosure.
You can imagine that Tim was really relieved two weeks ago when he got hired at one of the most prestigious media companies in the world.
I asked him how it was going when we spoke a few days ago. His answer knocked me out of my chair.
He told me that his boss made a slight “remark” and it really made Tim angry. He was already complaining about his new boss and was “re-thinking” his decision to take the job.
Tim may have had a justifiable gripe but I didn’t think it mattered. I just couldn’t believe he was complaining. Here he had an opportunity to work again – and the alternative was foreclosure and divorce.
It occurred to me that Tim was either completely insane or he was going to work for the wrong reasons.

I asked him to tell me why he goes work and this is what he came up with:
a. To support his family.
b. To be of service to the company he works for.
c. To contribute to the world.
Intellectually…very nice. But to me, his answer wasn’t complete.

I asked him if there were other reasons. He couldn’t come up with any so I suggested he also goes to work to be:

a. Important
b. Right
c. Liked
d. Looked up to
e. Taken care of
f. Powerful and strong
I gave him examples of how he sought out those payoffs time and time again.
For example, I asked why he reacted so strongly to the remark his boss made.
I suggested that it was because we wasn’t getting what he wanted – which was to be important, strong, looked up to etc..


If all he wanted to do was to take care of his family and contribute to his new firm and the world, he would have let that remark made by the employer roll off his back…right?
Tim takes what other people do and say personally – especially at his job. As a result, work… doesn’t work. That’s why he usually finds himself unemployed shortly after he lands a job.
I suggested that he has a real opportunity to turn this situation around once and for all.
If you struggle with the people at work, this exercise can help you too:
1. Write down why you think you go to work.
Like Tim, this list probably includes paying your bills, taking care of your family, doing a good job for your employer, advancement etc.
2. Write down all the social and psychological payoffs that you don’t want to admit to.
This is show time. You have to be honest. Part of the reason you go to work is because you have social and personal needs that have nothing to do with money. Nothing wrong with that.
You probably want to enjoy yourself. Why not? You spend more of your waking time at work than any other place….right? You want to be liked and respected…..who doesn’t?
In moderation, these are all just human needs and they won’t get you into trouble. The real rough water starts when you want to be “important”.
This is something you may not want to admit to – I certainly don’t. But if you find yourself at odds with others, it may be something you need to look at.
This is all about ego. It has nothing to do with why you are really go to work. If you allow your ego to call the shots at work – always looking for a way to be revered by your co-workers or employer, you’ll alienate everyone around you. Just don’t be surprised when you don’t have a job.
Even if you are the smart one, it doesn’t matter.
If you go looking for worshipers at work, you’re going to tick people off.
You may not realize what you are doing but other people do. Need proof?
When the guy in the next office is positioning….you see what he’s up to…right?
Well…guess what……he knows it when you are doing the same thing.

3. Keep this list on your desk at all times.
You’re only human. You aren’t perfect. You have character flaws; everyone does. Review this list often and it will help you remain aware and “awake”.
Don’t beat yourself up – but it’s time to put a leash on your ego.
When you catch yourself trying to flex your muscles for all the wrong reasons, call it out. Laugh at yourself and tell your co-workers that your ego must have gotten the better of you – then get back on track. Don’t have a 3-day seminar on the subject but don’t try to cover it up either. If you make a mistake, be honest about it and then move on. Believe me, the people you work with will be amazed and appreciate your honesty.
4. Don’t expect the world to be perfect.
Believe it or not, not everyone is going to read this post. Your boss might be a huge ego freak and you can’t change it.
Realize that it’s not about you. If she’s looking for ego strokes and by so doing, puts you down, she probably does that to other people too. Don’t take it personally. I know that’s easy to say and hard to do.
If it gets to be too much, you’ll need to look for a different boss somehow. I’ll leave that part to you. Just don’t allow someone else to push your buttons if you can.
What make me such an expert on this subject?
I spent years trying to make sure everyone know how smart I was. When I didn’t get what I wanted, I went ballistic. I had to do a lot of work on myself in order to stop doing that. I’m not perfect…but I do it considerably less now.
That old behavior cost me so much time, life and love. It almost cost me everything.
That’s why this is such a hot button for me.
I still blow it from time to time. When I do, I try to call it out and move on. When people at work try to prove how important they are, I just try to remember that I have the same character flaw and it helps me stay calm.
Pardon me.
After all the years I spent making this mistake, I just think it’s really dumb to struggle when you don’t have to. If you are clear about why you go to work and get back on track when you forget……..most of your work challenges will disappear.

How about you. What do you think is the main cause of trouble at work? How does it impact you? What have you done about it?

What is your locus?

Yesterday, a young lady boxer from Hyderabad, sadly ended her life with a dose of poison.

Post the event, theories as to the cause are as usual many. From a harassing coach, to family disputes to simple frustration.Whatever the cause may be, the death siganlled, a sad end to what could have been a promising sporting career......

What drives a person to take his/her own life? What gives them the courage? I'm no psychologist, but by experience, belive that personality has got a good deal to do, with it & also how a person views life or death.

Another aspect of personality, that would effect the current discussuion, is 'Locus of Control'.

What is Locus of Control?

Locus of Control refers to an individual's perception about the underlying main causes of events in his/her life. Or, more simply:

Do you believe that your destiny is controlled by yourself or by external forces (such as fate, god, or powerful others)?
The full name Rotter gave the construct was Locus of Control of Reinforcement. In giving it this name, Rotter was bridging behavioural and cognitive psychology. Rotter's view was that behaviour was largely guided by "reinforcements" (rewards and punishments) and that through contingencies such as rewards and punishments, individuals come to hold beliefs about what causes their actions. These beliefs, in turn, guide what kinds of attitudes and behaviours people adopt. This understanding of Locus of Control is consistent, for example, with Philip Zimbardo (a famous psychologist):

A locus of control orientation is a belief about whether the outcomes of our actions are contingent on what we do (internal control orientation) or on events outside our personal control (external control orientation)."

Is an internal locus of control desirable?

In general, it seems to be psychologically healthy to perceive that one has control over those things which one is capable of influencing.

In simplistic terms, a more internal locus of control is generally seen as desirable. Having an Internal locus of control can also be referred to as "self-agency", "personal control", "self-determination", etc. Research has found the following trends:

Males tend to be more internal than females

As people get older they tend to become more internal
People higher up in organisational structures tend to be more internal.
However, its important to warn people against lapsing in the overly simplistic view notion that internal is good and external is bad.
There are important subtleties and complexities to be considered. For example:

Internals can be psychologically unhealthy and unstable. An internal orientation usually needs to be matched by competence, self-efficacy and opportunity so that the person is able to successfully experience the sense of personal control and responsibility. Overly internal people who lack competence, efficacy and opportunity can become neurotic, anxious and depressed. In other words, internals need to have a realistic sense of their circle of influence in order to experience 'success'.

Externals on the other hand can lead easy-going, relaxed, happy lives.

Traditionally people from Eastern cultures have been found to be more fatalistic or with an External LOC. It would probably also go to explain why western cultures are materially more successful but also more stressed.

However just hang on..........This is what the Brihadranyaka Upanishad had to say..

Your are what your deep driving desire is,

As your desire is, so is your will,

As your will is, so is your deed,

As your deed is, so is your destiny..........

Did the lady in question have an external LOC and decided that events could not be controlled or was she strongly internal and decided that she was not good enough after about four years in training? Did LOC have anything to do with it at all?

Your guess is as good as mine.................................Please do let me know.

The bomb goes tick-tock.................

It is one area I watch with morbid fascination. I watch with a sense of awe and expectancy,impending doom, because I can see, bit by bit, piece by piece the explosive being readied for detonation and when it does happen, it is going to be painful, cause a great deal of hand wringing and life in the work place is never going to be the same again or workplace dynamics are going to change for ever. If you think I'm alluding to Pokhran III, then you have got me wrong.I'm talking about 'Sexual Harassment' at the work place. By default we assume that the harassed are generally women, but that need not be. However its an area I'm not going into here. Sexual harassment is in the air, literally, these days due to the spat on Air India Sharjah-Lucknow-Delhi flight IC-884 on October 3rd,where an air hostess accused the Captain of harassing her, which in her opinion was sexual in nature. The charge, has since been dismissed and the air hostess suspended post an in house disciplinary enquiry.I watch these charges with morbid fascination, because in this area, we are babes in the wood. The Macho Indian man, high on Power Distance, thinks it his divine right to lord it over all women, at home and otherwise. The young, independent, Indian women, single and wanting to live life, are exploring a new path and on occasion are guilty of flirting with the wrong types, giving wrong signals which then leads to charges and counter charges.Unfortunately both men and women in India are new to the game, are exploring areas not visited before and therein lies the challenge. The bomb is waiting to go off because women are flooding the work place and most organizations have not the faintest clue as to how do deal with any kind of harassment and many a HR would run hearing the word 'Sexual' ( It takes an effort to discuss the issue in class ) Sexual Harassment as an issue, is a serious subject for discussion and must be dealt with in academic institutions if the force of detonation is going to be softened. Who & what is the type of harassment? There is usually more than one type of harassing behavior present, so a single harasser will often fit more than one category. These are brief summations of each type. Power-player - Legally termed "quid pro quo" harassment, these harassers insist on sexual favors in exchange for benefits they can dispense because of their positions in hierarchies: getting or keeping a job, favorable grades, recommendations, credentials, projects, promotion, orders, and other types of opportunities. One-of-the-Gang - harassment occurs when groups of men or women embarrass others with lewd comments, physical evaluations, or other unwanted sexual attention. Harassers may act individually in order to belong or impress the others, or groups may gang up on a particular target. Serial Harasser - Harassers of this type carefully build up an image so that people would find it hard to believe they would do anyone any harm. They plan their approaches carefully, and strike in private so that it is their word against that of their victims. Groper - Whenever the opportunity presents itself, these harassers' eyes and hands begin to wander, engaging in unwanted physical contact that may start innocuous but lead to worse. Opportunist - Opportunist use physical settings and circumstances, or infrequently occurring opportunities, to mask premeditated or intentional sexual behavior towards targets. This will often involve changing the environment in order to minimize inhibitory effects of the workplace or school or taking advantage of physical tasks to 'accidentally' grope a target. Bully - In this case, sexual harassment is used to punish the victim for some transgression, such as rejection of the harasser's interest or advances, or making the harasser feel insecure about himself or herself or his or her abilities. The bully uses sexual harassment to put the victim in his or her "proper place." Situational Harasser - Harassing behavior begins when the perpetrator endures a traumatic event (psychological), or begins to experience very stressful life situations, such as psychological or medical problems, marital problems, or divorce. The harassment will usually stop if the situation changes or the pressures are removed. Pest - This is the stereotypical "won't take 'no' for an answer" harasser who persists in hounding a target for attention and dates even after persistent rejections. This behavior is usually misguided, with no malicious intent. Intellectual Seducer - Most often found in educational settings, these harassers will try to use their knowledge and skills as an avenue to gain access to students, or information about students, for sexual purposes. They may require students participate in exercises or "studies" that reveal information about their sexual experiences, preferences, and habits. Incompetent - These are socially inept individuals who desire the attentions of their targets, who do not reciprocate these feelings. They may display a sense of entitlement, believing their targets should feel flattered by their attentions. When rejected, this type of harasser may use bullying methods as a form of revenge. Stalking - The persistent watching, following, contacting or observing of an individual, sometimes motivated by what the stalker believes to be love, or by sexual obsession, or by anger and hostility. Unintentional - Acts or comments of a sexual nature, not intended to harass, can constitute sexual harassment if another person feels uncomfortable with such subjects As an HR, I watch with interest, the drama unfold...........and hope that academicians and senior managers give the issue its due. What is at stake? The harassed suffer psychological damage which many a time is not reversible and the organization may have to live with disengaged employees and attrition rates that are not tenable, while the harasser gets off scot free.A situation that no decent organization, should be able to live with!
Interestingly in a experiential exercise in my International HRM class, I found that many of my students said that they would rather downplay the incident, than make an issue.
To me that would be suicide...............